Here’s 25 amazing things about your clitoris that you should know, to help you have better sex.

1. Your clitoris is purpose-built for pleasure. For nothing else at all, but to provide your orgasms to order.

2. ‘Clitoris’ is Greek for ‘Key.’

3. Less than 1/5 of your clitoris is visible. The rest is tucked away but you can feel how big and sensitive it gets during sex.

4. Shaped like a wishbone (or angel wings) your clitoris extends downwards and backwards from the visible tip. The exact location varies. What pleasures your friend, (or your partner’s ex) may not do it for you.

5. The clitoris is the same size as a penis, about 5 inches long.

5. Your clitoris has erectile tissue just like the penis, so it swells when you’re fully aroused.

7. With 8,000 nerve endings it gives it provides four times the sensation men get.

8. 80% of women orgasm solely with clitoral stimulation. The winged part may be out of reach during penis thrusts within the vagina.Try different positions, and rotating hip thrusts, maximize contact.

9. You feel different sensations along each part, outside to inside.

10. You can have a whopper of an orgasm during the birth of your baby.

11. Clitorises shrivel up and atrophy if they don’t get regular attention.

12. They never age.

13. Size matters for women. A petite clitoris simply needs more attention..

14. Your clitoris increases in size from puberty onwards.  Maybe that’s why it gets easier to achieve orgasm in your thirties, forties …

15. If f there’s more than a 6mm gap between clitoris and vagina, it takes longer to orgasm during penetrative sex. Oral and digital stimulation is more effective.

16. Orgasm varies with  hormone shifts – pregnancy,  after birth, during breast-feeding and in menopause.

17. A clitoris needs no rest after orgasm. Men need a recovery (refraction) time. Women are designed to enjoy multiple orgasms.

18. The first official mention of the clitoris comes from Italian anatomist Guiseppe Falloppi in 1561. He brought us the ‘Fallopian’ tubes.

19. Friendly names for the clitoris include The Love Button, Clit, Clitty, The Hooded Lady, The Little Penis, The Black Pearl, The Peak of Venus, The Vulva Nose, and Miss Poppy, to name but a few.

20. Merely thinking about sex (fantasizing) gets you aroused enough to set off an orgasm. Super-sensitive women clitoral sensation simply by kissing.

21.Worrying hijacks your orgasm. Hypnotherapy prevents sabotage, keeping you in the pleasure zone.

22. Orgasm gives your vagina, womb and Fallopian tubes a high-octane workout, keeping them healthy and strong.  You’ll boost fertility, get your womb fit for pregnancy and ease headaches and reduce period cramps.

23. 18%-40% of women don’t orgasm. Many fake it to keep a partner happy.

24. You don’t need an orgasm to conceive. Sperm find their own way to the Fallopian tubes but why  would you want to miss out on a glorious start to pregnancy?

25. Orgasm is good for you, and safe for your unborn baby.

Infertility is stressful, and baby-making sex relegates a healthy pleasure to a pressured chore. Reliable orgasm reduces stress, and prepares the way for pregnancy.

Get clit-literate

A surprising number of women I treat have never orgasmed, or only do so rarely. They didn’t learn to do it for themselves, or how to develop it with a partner. Sex is ‘grand’ or boring, but could be so much better. Learning about your orgasm is a life skill, just like driving. No need for guesswork, mind-reading or pretending when you know you orgasm.

Your face is different to anyone else’s …and so are your lady parts. Go on, get a mirror or the phone and take a look and see what what’s what.

Discover your orgasm

Do this solo to start with so you don’t feel pressured if you’re a newbie.

Get comfy in bed, on the sofa, in a bath or shower, no need for scattered rose petals and a four poster when you’re on your own. Plan to be undisturbed for about 20 mins 3 times a week. This is a skills training process!

Start after a workout, or a swim, to reap the glowing benefits of increased circulation.

Lying  down, or sitting up, through underwear or directly, with a gentle fingertip, begin to touch your lips. Lube helps until your own kicks in. Explore, and notice what it feels like.That’s important. Notice what it feels like.No judging, simply notice.

Stroke across your clitoris in a diagonal pattern.

Tap gently with a fingertip.

Check out a whole hand, one hand on top of the other.

Flick with a soft, middle finger – not the fingernail side.

Stay in one place or move around the whole area.

Use a circular motion.

Vary the tempo, pressure and depth.

Press down and rotate a coin-sized area.

Try out each stroke for about 3-4 minutes, unless you don’t like it.

Check again, next time it may feel different.

Spiral around your clitoris without touching it.

Spread two fingers on either side of your clitoris and stroke at varying speeds.

Use the warm water from a hand-held shower head, at different rates.

In the zone

Notice the sensations, as you explore your whole vulval area. What is going through your mind?

Are you focusing on a great sexual encounter, a porn clip, or your own daydream?

Are you afraid you’ll be ‘caught’ doing it alone?

If there’s a lot of guilt or shameful types of feeling, consider brief professional therapy to let them go.

Solo orgasming is a lot quieter than anything  in a porn movie.

Share, if you dare!